I worry that my issues arent nearly as important as everyone else’s and that i’m just being selfish

I’m afraid that I’ll end up hurting myself for the first time in years now that I’m stuck in the house with my overbearing parents for who knows how long

I’m worried I’ll be like this forever

I’m worried I’ll never figure out what’s going on in my head

i feel like giving up

i miss my therapist and i am no longer able to see her as i have aged out. i have so much building up and i just need to talk to someone that won’t judge and will offer me support and help but i cant afford to get a therapist

I’m worried that no one will care about me, that I’ll fail in class, and if those two happened, I’d kill myself.

I am worried that I will keep cutting until I can’t come out of ‘shock’

I’m scared to lose everybody I care about simply because they find out I’m gay. I have one adult I confide in and I can’t help but wonder if she’s the only person I’ll always have

I am afraid that if i feel like people don’t care anymore then that i’m going to kill myself and how it will affect those people.

I am worried I’ll hurt myself

I am worried, if I stop talking they will forget about me, and abandon me. So I talk and talk, despite how annoying I get, and how mad everyone gets. Because if I stop, I worry I’ll fade to nothing.

I’m afraid that I’ll be left behind and that I’ll never not feel empty

i’m worried that my friends don’t care about me

I worry that my boyfriend will move on to another girl

Ive been very upset and Depressed when i got bullied

Basically my life consists of this big mystery illness. Constantly nauseous and vomiting, but no other signs of any kind of sickness. Some doctors wanna tell me it’s my anxiety and panic attacks, but some other doctors (like my psychiatrist) are completely against that idea, and are positive that is not it. I used to make myself puke to get rid of water weight, which was fine because I was in control, but not it’s completely out of my hands. In hospital every other day, ambulances, being admitted Abe never leaving with an answer to this mystery that has ruined my life so profoundly, but has also helped in a way. Last time I weighed myself is when I got admitted this week, it’s been several days since I’ve got to check again. I’m anxious. I don’t wanna eat and vomit, I don’t wanna eat and blow up and get even fatter because I haven’t been able to eat in so long while in hospital. My weight on the hospital scale was 61kg, that’s scares me. I want to get better but I don’t want to get fat, my mind and body are telling me two different things. When I’m extremely sick I find myself miserable, sometimes I’ll even pray to make it stop, I’m not religious but it gives me hope. But then when I feel better, I just find myself trying to find ways to keep loosing weight, nothing works as effectively as the puking so sometimes I even find myself wishing to get sick again. I know that sounds selfish and it’s not the hospital attention I want, I just wanna be thin. And beautiful. I just want skinny. Light as a feather, skinny as a rail. I want to BE skin and bones. And it’s tearing my life apart..

Why can’t my life be over? I wish I could get a serious illness to die from, I don’t want to have a painful death. I do not want to suffer. But then I feel selfish for all the individuals fighting for their lives, and for my family, but why couldn’t they be happy for me and just say, “she’s finally where she wanted to be” Six years, six years in and out of hospitals, off and on medications. Will my life always be like this? I don’t want to cause pain to myself because I experience enough pain in my everyday life, that’s why I want it to end. Will an overdose make me suffer?

What about when I’m older and I reach a difficult point? What if I relapse into my old ways

I’m going through so much. My family has money issues and my mom constantly talks to me about my parents divorce and the money issues. I know she needs someone to talk to, but I’m only 13! I only understand some of what’s going on an its to much for me to handle. I don’t want to know about all of this